|Hilary Duff||Yonica Babyyeah|
|Marisa Tomei||Natalie Hegalhuzen|
|Joan Cusack||Marsha Dillon|
|Dan Aykroyd||Mr. Vice President|
|Sergej Trifunovic||Ooq-Mi-Fay Taqnufmini|
|Ned Bellamy||Ooq-Yu-Fay Taqnufmini/Zubleh|
Assassin Brand Hauser is sent to Turaqistan to carry out a hit. Occupied by the US corporation Tamerlane, Turaqistan is a potential corporate goldmine just waiting to be exploited. Unfortunately, a Middle Eastern oil minister stands in the way of Tamerlane sucking the region dry of all its resources. Hired to dispose of the meddling minister, Hauser must pretend he is producing a trade show for Tamerlane while he plots the hit.